I’m Here

These demons taunt me every night and I often cannot sleep well. But, I’m here.

I sin against you with my thoughts and I don’t always agree with you. But, I’m here.

I’m repeatedly wrong, very, very wrong. But, I’m here.

I’m a very emotional being and I regularly make so many mistakes, so many. But, I’m here.

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! Ps. 51:1-2

I say the wrong things, my tongue speeds to speak evil. But, I’m here.

I see the faces of those I offend with my boldness (which numerous times isn’t wise). But, I’m here.

I have idols in my heart.

I often want to stray away from you when the world seems appetizing or when the whispers of the wolf packs entice me; they attempt to hypnotize me with their presence, and my desires do not succor me since they are magnetizing.

But God, you care for me, you protect me. Christ, you armor me with jewels that I often call a cage, yet, you keep me here!

Come back, come back! Take me to my first love!!!

Abba!!!

Where else am I going to go? If not you then who? I want you!

I hate this darkness that remains in me! I hate that I cannot be like you. But, I want to be like you. I want you! I’m here Abba!

Remember when I first met you?

I saw you dimly from afar in the mist of the fog. I was trembling as you approached me, but once you stood before me the fog dispersed and I could see you clearly. I knelled, I had too! I asked you to forever hold me in your arms!

Thus, again I kneel before you. Hold me in your arms! Don’t let me go! Don’t let me let you go! I’m here!!!

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